Monday, October 2, 2023

How to Shut Down a Rude Person: 8 Disarming Phrases to Use

How to Shut Down a Rude Person:

8 Disarming Phrases to Use

By Sherrie Hurd, A.A.

learning-mind.com

Posted on October 2, 2023



Would you like to learn how to shut down a rude person? I thought so. You know, life is hard enough without letting the negative vibes of others get under your skin.

It doesn’t matter who you are, at some point in your life, you’ll need to shut down a rude person. There’s just no getting around it. Yes, you can usually walk away or choose to say nothing, but pressure builds. Eventually, you must do something.

How to Shut Down a Rude Person

Learning how to shut down a rude person requires a level of skill, especially when you’re constantly faced with rude people. But you can learn. Unkind people are everywhere; they’re family members, friends, partners, and strangers.

You can be rude sometimes too. But hey, I bet plenty of people have shut you down.

So today, I want to provide a few phrases to use when others are being unkind and saying hurtful things. Some of these phrases are simple, while some of them dig a bit deeper into why individuals are rude.

Let’s learn how to shut down a rude person, shall we? You can start by saying…

1. “You’re correct”

Sometimes, it’s easy to tell when another person is being rude. They often try to instigate arguments. In these situations, they will say anything to upset you, so you will fight with them.

You’ve probably seen “know-it-alls” who spew information rudely, expecting others to try to prove them wrong. However, the best way to shut down a rude person of this caliber is to say,“You’re right”.

2. “I appreciate your opinion”

Sometimes people do not mean to be rude at all. Many individuals just talk this way, trying to get their point across. To shut this obnoxious tone down, you can calmly acknowledge the other person’s opinion.

No, you may not agree with what they’re saying, but letting them know that you value their perspective may quell some of the hostility. No, you shouldn’t tolerate rudeness. But you can appreciate the opinions of others, neutralizing the negative vibes in the conversation.

3. “I am sorry you’re having a bad day”

I’ve come to understand that rude people, for the most part, aren’t just being mean for no reason. Many times, you can shut down a rude person by trying to understand why they’re acting in that manner. There is always a cause and effect.

And no, there’s no excuse for choosing to be angry when something’s happened to you, but it’s a common reaction. This reaction spills onto others; people can be rude to friends, family, or strangers because they’re already upset.

So, to put a stop to the toxic conversation, you can say, “I am sorry you’re upset” or something similar.

4. “Thank you”

A mature response is simply saying, “Thank you”. This phrase lets the rude person know that their words didn’t affect you. Remember, when someone is being rude, they expect a rude response.

However, to shut down a rude person and completely change the vibe, a simple acknowledgment of their harsh remarks may be all you need. Basically, you’re responding with,

“I appreciate what you’re saying, but I will not join your vile banter.”

5. “I’m done with this conversation”

Here’s the thing: rudeness can make you furious. And when that happens, the phrase you need the most will be words like, “I’m done talking to you”, or something close to that. Anger will prevent you from saying anything constructive to calm the other person.

So, putting an end to the conversation may be the only way to prevent more negative words and possible actions. Halting the conversation allows you to take the high road and retain your dignity.

6. “That could have hurt my feelings.”

It’s also okay to be a little sarcastic if it keeps you calm. Phrases like, “That could have made me cry, you know” or “You almost hurt my feelings” can show the other person that you’re willing to brush the whole thing off.

It also shows them that their words didn’t really hurt you at all. And if their remarks don’t affect you, then they will probably just shut up. And that’s really what we want now, isn’t it?

7. “Must you be negative?”

Let’s make that mean person think twice about what they’re saying. And we can do this by turning the comment back upon them. Ask them one question when they are rude:

“Why are you being so negative?”

This question makes them think for a moment before hurling another harsh statement at you. Sometimes, they will even tone down their verbal assaults when they realize just how negative they’re being. It might not work all the time, but it’s worth a shot.

8. “Did you mean to be rude? Good job!”

Here’s one more sarcastic comeback for the road. I just thought this one was hilarious, and honestly, it seems like it would embarrass a rude person.

And yes, you can be a mature person and still say things like this. It throws rude people off their drama and makes them think about what they’re doing. It’s humorous and it could disarm them to the point of laughter. Who knows, it could even lighten their day.
How can we shut down a rude person?




There are many ways to shut down a rude person. Like I said before, most of the time you can just walk away. But if you’re in a position where you cannot leave, then you’ll have to be creative.

I do suggest that when someone is being rude, first, remain calm. Wait a moment, gather your thoughts, and respond maturely. Even being a little sarcastic can still be a mature move.

If it’s family or a romantic partner, responding in the right manner will be more difficult. I understand this. So, it’s important to hold your tongue until you’re able to respond logically and without returning hostility. This may take some practice.

If you’re encountering rude people in your life, I hope these phrases helped you figure out a way to put a stop to your negative experiences. To shut down a rude person, patience and love are key.

Coming from a place of love is always better than coming from hurt feelings. Never take another person’s harsh comments as a reflection of your character because most rude people just have inner conflicts. Remember that, and I wish you the best.

Featured image by benzoix on Freepik

Sherrie Hurd


About the author:
 

Sherrie Hurd, A.A.
Staff writer at Learning Mind
Sherrie Hurd is a professional writer and artist with over 20 years of experience. As a survivor of childhood trauma and multiple types of abuse, she is an advocate for mental health awareness. Sherrie manages multiple mental illnesses, including anxiety disorder, bipolar disorder, and PTSD. With this background and personal experience, she strives to help others overcome trauma and abuse, cope with mental illness, and heal over time.

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